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Friday, December 28, 2012

Coffee/Tea Date


I am drinking pomegranate tea instead of coffee. I ran out of kcups so tea it is :) 

We are nearly done moving and this weekend we will be done and the place cleaned out. Ready to turn our keys in. YAY!!

Please comment with your New Years resolutions. 

Saturday, December 22, 2012

Gift Exchange

I am a big fan of gift exchanges, especially when it is closer to the holidays.

I've known Jill, who blogs under Ernestine Edna, for a bit now. And when I found out about her Ernestine Edna's Handmade Gift Exchange I decided to participate in it.

I received a package from Abby :) (I wish I could link her up but I don't have her info)

It was peeking up out of my mail box. And I am a sucker for when the mail arrives if a package comes I swoon lol.

I quickly opened it up. And I JUST HAD to snap the above picture.



Abby included a nice pin (to the left) and earrings!! I adore them they are super cute.

And then I was super surprised to see a special gift from Jill herself.
I have enjoyed this swap and hope Jill has it again.

Wednesday, December 19, 2012

What Do You Want in a Relationship?

I've recently found myself in a weird position... a weird position for myself.

Until recently I happened to be the girl who had more guy friends than girl friends. So I would have a lot of guys asking me if I had single friends and sadly I didn't. Of the very few women that I was friends with they were all married or in a steady relationship.

Well now the tables have turned. I happen to have more girl friends than guy friends. And some of those are single. And now they are asking... do you know any guys that are single?

So it brings me to today's blog post... What do you want in a relationship?

You see one could ask "what do you want in a guy/girl?" but that truly isn't the correct question to ask. What are you going to say? I want him to be 6'5" have blonde hair and blue eyes. He needs to be HOT like Channing Tatum and have a rocking personality.  He can't be a jerk.

Or I want a girl she needs to be 5'6" no red heads, big boobs... oh yes I was asked these things once and I rolled my eyes. But you get the point.

You can't find someone based on looks.

You need to figure out what you want in a relationship?

Loyalty! This would be a big one for me. I remember back when Mr. Y and I were friends and I was discussing with him the guy of my dreams (we were just friends then). And the fact he had to be loyal was at least number one on my list or near the top.

Trust!! You have to be able to trust a person. If you don't have trust then I mean... what do you have?

Some would add in sex... I'll changing that to compatibility. Do the two of you get along? Can you get along for more than ten minutes? If you were out to dinner and after the first fifteen minutes would the rest be in silence? You need to have compatibility. Otherwise you will have many silent dinners.

I wish I could tell you the best ways to get a man. But I honestly don't know. I wasn't even looking to date him. I wasn't looking period. We became friends and soon found out we were compatible.... ERR We were friends for a very long time and in all honestly I turned my best friend into my husabnd.

My way won't work for everyone. Like one of my sisters has been married to her high school sweetheart for years. I do believe in love at first sight. Everyone has a different love story.

Although we would all love to be married to Channing Tatum (okay not all of us) but he's taken and expecting his first child. But you can find someone you are meant to be with.

It's my personal belief the big guy up stairs knows what he's doing and has the perfect someone for each of us.

I think it's why he lead me to convert to Judaism.  He does truly have things figured out. So let go and let him guide you.


Friday, December 14, 2012

Coffee Date 12/14

Wow it's been a while since I've done one of these.

Please don't forget of my Pampered Chef Party.

I am super excited about this. And hosting this party is the beginning of this journey. And I would appreciate any help!!

I look forward to seeing your coffee dates! Until next time.

Tuesday, December 11, 2012

Some Nights


Some Nights by Fun. happens to be one of my favorite songs.
Some nights, I stay up cashing in my bad luck
Some nights, I call it a draw
Some nights, I wish that my lips could build a castle
Some nights, I wish they'd just fall off

But I still wake up, I still see your ghost
Oh Lord, I'm still not sure what I stand for oh
What do I stand for? What do I stand for?
Most nights, I don't know anymore...
Oh whoa, oh whoa, oh whoa oh oh
Oh whoa, oh whoa, oh whoa oh oh

This is it, boys, this is war - what are we waiting for?
Why don't we break the rules already?
I was never one to believe the hype - save that for the black and white
I try twice as hard and I'm half as liked, but here they come again to jack my style

And that's alright; I found a martyr in my bed tonight
She stops my bones from wondering just who I am, who I am, who I am
Oh, who am I? mmm... mmm...

Well, some nights, I wish that this all would end
Cause I could use some friends for a change
And some nights, I'm scared you'll forget me again
Some nights, I always win, I always win...

But I still wake up, I still see your ghost
Oh Lord, I'm still not sure what I stand for, oh
What do I stand for? What do I stand for?
Most nights, I don't know... (come on)

So this is it? I sold my soul for this?
Washed my hands of that for this?
I miss my mom and dad for this?

(Come on)

No. When I see stars, when I see, when I see stars, that's all they are
When I hear songs, they sound like this one, so come on
Oh, come on. Oh, come on, OH COME ON!

Well, that is it guys, that is all - five minutes in and I'm bored again
Ten years of this, I'm not sure if anybody understands
This one is not for the folks at home; Sorry to leave, mom, I had to go
Who the fuck wants to die alone all dried up in the desert sun?

My heart is breaking for my sister and the con that she call "love"
When I look into my nephew's eyes...
Man, you wouldn't believe the most amazing things that can come from...
Some terrible {lies|nights}...ahhh...

Oh whoa, oh whoa, oh whoa, oh oh
Oh whoa, oh whoa, oh whoa, oh oh

The other night, you wouldn't believe the dream I just had about you and me
I called you up, but we'd both agree
It's for the best you didn't listen
It's for the best we get our distance... oh...
It's for the best you didn't listen
It's for the best we get our distance... oh...
I've had insomnia for quite some time now and one restless night I came upon this song.

Boy I sure do think on the nights that I get ~2 hours of sleep that I am cashing in on my bag luck.

And I do have to admit the question that has haunted me is: what do I stand for?

But then watch the music video and it hits you harder.
Honestly I don't think the full impact of a song can be realized until you watch the music video. The music video can tell you so much and open your mind.

With having insomnia for so long I can express the haunting of ghosts... err or should I say memories. Those that perhaps you don't want will especially come flooding back. And the simple act of a husband's love scares the ghosts and keeps them at bay.

My sleeping husband has a tendency, without him knowing, to slip his arm around me and pull me close to him. He is soundly sleeping and does not aware anything is haunting me. That simple act he does by pulling me close to him and holding on. It does more than show his love for me, it does more than keep at bay any bad thoughts I am thinking of... it reminds me I am not alone.

Some nights that I have may be bad but those same nights are proven they are not as bad as I may think they are.

Just remember that. No matter how bad you think something is, shine a little love and you will see it's not.

Thursday, December 6, 2012

Basic

I am into makeup.

I don't go truly over the top but I am a big believer you get what you spend. So I invest in my makeup.

There are a few brands that I trust. Nars, Urban Decay, Smashbox...

I am allergic to certain things and I've used certain makeup and don't react so I trust them. But Bare Minerals I am highly allergic to so I avoid them. Benefit as well. I have no idea what they put it in to give me hives but I do.

I haven't bought makeup in a while. I've gotten some stuff for free here and there. But it's been a while since I purchased something. The last thing I bought when I walked into Sephora was shampoo, snap I need to go get more soon lol. I tend to only get nail polish at Ulta.

When the Naked palette came out by Urban Decay I had to have it. Only I waited because I had a ton of eye shadow and didn't want to waste it. So I waited to get it. And I love it. When the Naked 2 palette came out I wanted that one too. But again I waited.

But then this palette came out...

Urban Decay Naked Basic... 

There were a few reasons I purchased this. First it was smaller than the Naked palette that I had, which appeals to me because I can slip it into my bag and take with me. Second is a shade, W.O.S stands for Walk of Shame. 

I am a sucker for names!! The Nars lipstick/lipgloss that I have is only because of their names. Seriously Catfight, like I wasn't going to get that lipstick. Yes it happens to look good on me.

So the minute Urban Decay posted on their Facebook page a preview of this palette I had to have it. In fact it was my spurge this month.

It came in the mail and I would love to try it on and show you. But I have something wrong with my eye and am avoiding eye makeup right now.

They think I have a clogged tear duct :(  My eyes get scratchy cause tears aren't being produced and inside corner of my eye is swelled. I go to the eye doctor later on today to figure it all out.

I do need a new eye exam but it isn't that type of eye doctor. It's the good kinda haha well one that can figure out what is wrong with my eye not just check my eyes and give me an exam type. So once my eye gets sorted I will be trying these shades out.

I so far see myself using: venus, naked 2, faint, and crave the most. W.O.S. I will use as a highlighter, maybe even alone. Who knows. The choices are endless.

And they go well with my Naked palette. 

One thing I love about Urban Decay eye shadow is how long they last. By all means they have lasted longer than my Nars. My last Nars eye shadow lasted me a summer. I used it every day though so got my moneys worth. And it is something I'd use again. I have just one part of the eye shadow yet. But I am waiting for the summer to roll around to get it. 

This past summer I mainly used my Urban Decay Naked, or the last of my Nars. 

Going into winter I can switch to a neutral shade with no pop of color. My Nars has a pop of purple, my favorite color.

Have you tried this palette yet? Any other makeup? Let me know.

Wednesday, December 5, 2012

A Royal Crush

When I was growing up I had dreams and aspirations of becoming a Princess. Thank you Disney for giving me the ability to dream, and dream big.

Sadly HRH (his/her royal highness) Prince Charles of Wales was a tad bit too old for my taste. Similarly his son HRH Prince William was a tad bit too young. And growing up as a child I heard a lot about the Royal Family of Britain. Partially thanks to Princess Diana and Prince Charles.

I grew up. And well... my tastes in men became more defined (lol it's the only way I know how to put it). Some where along the line I became fascinated with Denmark and Sweden. I actually have dreams and to visit both of these countries.

In learning more about Sweden, because I am learning how to speak Swedish. I stumbled upon HRH Prince Carl of Sweden.
[VIA]
HELLLOOOOO PRINCE CARL!!

He just so happens to be close to my age. Sadly when I was single I did not live in Sweden nor had the ability to meet him. Damn my luck. But I have an amazing husband so I will give up my Princess dreams.

But yes I've had a crush on dear Prince Carl for some time now. I love seeing updated pictures of him. Can't quite understand why he hasn't married anyone. Meh maybe he's waiting for Mrs. Right. Sorry Prince Carl if you were waiting on me I'm spoken for lol.

Do you have a crush on someone? Oh I also like Channing Tatum of course. But when someone asks me who I have a crush on it's really Prince Carl.

So I am interested in hearing who you have a celebrity/royal crush on.


Wednesday, April 11, 2012

Just don't understand people??

I decided to switch over to the Timeline that Facebook has. 

Through a few pages I run I have gotten used to it (back in at the end of March they forced all pages to switch over to the new Timeline).  

So today I thought... okay why not just switch over now... makes complete sense to me.

I go through the tour and upload my "cover photo". And then started a tour. I then see bright as day a photo I am tagged in that I don't want to be tagged in. I remove the tag. This goes on for a bit from the same person. When I get to a certain one it prompts me to just ask the user to remove the photo.

Sounds easy... I walk through the steps on Facebook. And Facebook sends an automated response.


The "Hey, I don't like this..." was generated by Facebook. I sent it because it had a picture attached so this person could go... oh that one, and just remove it. 

But no I get this string of messages. I blocked out both of our pictures and blocked out names. 

But how am I being immature for asking for a photo of me to be removed?? A photo I thought was removed a long time ago. But then found out today no it's not removed!!! And I don't want it there. 

Now I know if I had photos of this person up they would be stomping their feet wanting me to take it down right then and there. But I kindly ask them (*FB kindly asked them*). 

Then when this person even states don't write me again... Okay I can do that. I then told them that I would report the photo to FB so that FB could take it down (since it was apparent they were not going to).

As you see I reminded her FB sent her the picture. But this point in time I had walked away from my computer and the messages were coming to my iPad. So I can't send her the photo at this point in time and reminded her FB sent the photo to her. You can see it in this message stream, well sorta.

People like this frustrated me and they happen to widely populate the world.




Tuesday, April 10, 2012

Relationships

Warning... this will be a long blog post. But worth the read ;)


A relationship should be between two people, but with social media sites like Facebook and Twitter it can go beyond the couple and branch into other people.  But from there it can branch further and hitting other avenues like blogs, Tumbler, and other things.  It can go beyond the couple and onto family and friends, or perhaps spread onto strangers.  As each branch occurs more contact is happening, it becomes a game of telephone much like we played as a child and details begin to twist, and often enough soon comments are made that an individual has no idea about because of the impression they received beyond first hand experiences.

It would shock a few to realize that I am a tad shy of completing my sociology degree. That a year plus ago I was in the throws of having 15 minutes to run in between classes, a messenger bag full of books, and a few part time jobs to make ends meet.  That for several years in the realm of sociology I studied humanistic behavior specializing in what society deems as deviant behavior.

Of course after a while you begin to question why one particular thing is considered deviant, who is in the society that dictates what is or is not deviant, and why do we live in a society with social norms when so many of it's individuals like to "step outside the lines' so to speak.

If you were to pull out the papers I have written for classes you would see a theme pattern, sexual deviance.  But not just sexual deviance as nearly every sexual act can be deemed deviant depending upon who is judging examining it.  I have leaned towards transgendered category in the LGBT community, specifically male to female transitions.

Yet here I am as an individual writing about relationships. Not relationships between any specific persons, so not defining labels between female-male, male-male, or female-female, just plain relationships.  Let's just pretend for a moment we live in a society with no gender roles so we can approach the subject matter.

After reading a few things on Twitter, Facebook, and some blogs I was inspired to research a bit more on the subject matter.  I saw mainly woman judging other women on relationships they saw.  Not just to the women they were judging but to other women.  And then to see a group of women gather together and judge at a whole.  Upon further examination if one was to research further the women judging were completely wrong because of misconstrued facts.

A group of people of various age ranges, gender sexuality, etc were polled using Survey Monkey and Facebook.  Using Survey Monkey I was limited to 10 questions using their free account.  Opening the survey to 68 individuals allowed for a more unique range than in a college setting of traditional and nontraditional students.  In this group there were people who were serving or had served in the Armed Forces, people who were/are in a relationship with someone in the military, and who by my own hypothesis were thought to participate in the survey.  Of course it is assumed that by clicking the link provided in the event detail they were agreeing to participate and they were given the ability to skip questions if they did not feel comfortable answering.  Proper sociological research technique was not used because this was not something I would write about in hopes of getting published.  This was just for my own use.

Of the 68 people who were invited 26 decided to participate with 1 not fully completing the survey.

Eight questions were asked:

1. When it comes to someone else's relationship do you think it matters how long
they have been with that person to decide if they love each other or if
their relationship is real? If you think there is an appropriate time period
please list that (so if someone should be dating for 3 months or 3 weeks, etc)

2. Are you someone who has judged someone by their relationship for how long they 
have been with a person?

3. Do you know of anyone who judges someone by how long they have been
in a relationship?

4. Have you ever called someone a 'tag chaser'?

5. Have you been called a 'tag chaser'? 
If yes did it offend you and/or hurt your feelings

6. Have you dated multiple people that have been in the military? 
i.e. you once dated someone in the Army and years later dated someone in the Navy

7. If someone were talking about a friend of yours relationship, would you defend the
friend or remain silent? (say these people do not know you are their friend)

8. Are you in the military?

The first page was a welcome: "Hello :) This is a survey about a few questions regarding relationships. I would appreciate honest and open answers. Please not your names will not be used.  I am creating a blog about relationships."

And before the two 'tag chaser' questions: Tag chaser: a term that defines someone that


The questions along with responses:
*3 people skipped this question*

If yes did it offend you and/or hurt your feelings
3 responses, 1 of which had marked no
1. "it really bothered me because I have only been with my husband, and yes he is military
but I knew him before hand"
2. You're attracted to who you're attracted to, military shouldn't pay a part. Although
once you've been in a military relationship it's easier to begin another one because
you're used to it. It becomes a lifestyle. *this person had marked no*
3. yes it did

*1 person skipped this question*
*1 person skipped this question*

Analysis:
I was pleased to see the different responses for question 1.  And that the general response of those polled were that it didn't matter to them how long a person had been with someone.  As I pull out one of my textbooks making one of my sociology professors proud that I kept, Gender Roles: A Sociological Perspective by Linda L. Lindsey, I will quote a few things.  "Americans are so accustomed to viewing love and marriage as inseparable..." and it was only in "the Puritan era in the United States ushered in the revolutionary idea that love and marriage should be tied together".  I found those two thoughts important when thinking about this topic.  

In the majority of military relationships (or any relationship for that matter) there are certain love myths around.  A few from the book are love conquers all, love is blind, love at first sight, and one and only love forever.  I'll give a few quotes found around the internet that people in military relationships tend to use (for the majority).

"When you feel alone, just look at the spaces between your fingers,
remembering that in those spaces you see my fingers locked with yours forever"

"Sometimes you just have to be with the one who makes you smile,
even if it means waiting."

"The thought of being with you tomorrow gives me the strength to go on today"

From what I have noticed women in military relationships are more likely to gather in groups in support of one thing, that the person they love is in the military.  These groups can range in different things but they all look and hope for one thing: support.  More often enough quotes and sayings are found to help through a deployment or long period apart.  A military relationship can also fall into the category of long distance relationship so in ways they can go hand in hand.  But if you were to sit down a handful of people in a military relationship (made of mostly women) there would be the majority in that group that think there is a difference between their military relationship and a "civilian relationship" (defined as neither of the couples is in the military). But there are the same problems in a civilian relationship as there are in a military one.  

From what I can tell from previous research in the area of stepping outside a relationship, or cheating, it is more likely to happy when a person is distant from the relationship, or lacking something.  When you have a long distance relationship there is a strain already present in the relationship.  Add in that one of a person in the couple relationship is in the military in deployments cheating can happen.  From the different talks to individuals who have gone on deployments and have admitted to cheating wants me to research this further but without being enrolled in school currently I am limited at what I can do.  But what if research indicates that more than half of the military population have cheated.  This group of individuals marks a sustainable amount of society so would the correlation equate to around 30% or higher. 

Was it comforting to see an almost equal portion judged a person by their relationship? I would assume the statistical average I saw is similar in a larger group because of how easily it is to judge a person.  People in a society have the habit of doing this every day.  For instance you could see a homeless person in the streets begging for money and assume he is poor, but after his 'work' day is done he could walk over and step inside a BMW.  Perception is everything.  When an individual in a society portrays themselves as one way it is easy to judge.  But then with the third question being if they knew of anyone who judged was more alarming than the second question.  Hands down people knew others who judged.  This is what started this whole blog in the first place. Me seeing others judge and cast judgment. 

I purposefully defined 'tag chaser' because I am aware that people misuse the word. It is mostly used as a derogatory term like calling someone a bad name, and meant to attack and hurt their feelings.  I especially liked the comment "...although once you've been in a military relationship. It's EASIER to begin another one because you're used to it. It becomes a lifestyle almost..." In my own personal experience I found that partially true.  Shortly after I moved to Virginia I joined a dating website and had met a few individuals I dated or attempted to date and hands down a man in the military was looking for a woman who had previous dated someone in the military in hopes that she would understand and be more accepting of the lifestyle.  And as I expected with the question 6 others had dated other people that were in the military like myself.  Whether they purposefully went after those relationships or found those were the only people attracted to themselves.  When the pool is small it's harder to find different variety of fish ;)

I am glad to see majority of those polled would speak up to defend their friend in question 7. And that no one polled would join in on the conversation. In several blogs posts around the Internet I have seen people I knew in real life joining in on the conversation and participating.  If further blogs and other social media sites were investigated I wonder if there would be a low statistical representation of not joining in on the conversation.  Or should I have (if given the opportunity) asked if it was easier to distance yourself on the Internet than in real life. I know several people who remain anonymous on the Internet so is it a safety net, can you be harsher to your friends than in real life. Of course the only way to figure this out would be to submit a poll to those anonymous individuals and hope they participate, of course without revealing their identity.

Are you still with me, or have I lost you? Did you wonder on to a different much shorter blog post of another blogger not expecting this from me? Did it shock any of my readers that I am a sociology major and in fact only have a handful of classes to finish my degree? 

For those of you who quietly answered the questions I asked, did you follow along with majority? Were you shocked to really see what the term 'tag chaser' meant. I know I have seen it thrown around lately being misused, which I will assume is from miseducation. Were you alarmed at your answers? Remember it's never too late to change your attitude towards things.

I hope that I am given the opportunity to continue this study.  Be able to ask the questions (and more) to a broader range of people and definatily on a larger scale.  I was hoping a few people I had invited that I knew were serving would answer, but perhaps they could not. 

Don't worry my next blog post will be much shorter :)


Saturday, April 7, 2012

Rumors

Source

This was sent to me today, thank you dear friend for doing so, to cheer me up.

It was cute and something I definitely something I needed.